Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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