i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Randomize
