I'm drive I can fine osifer
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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