Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
