we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Congratulations! We have a period
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