i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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