have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
