Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
