i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
