Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
