guys are not supposed to queef...right?
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
