I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Randomize
