I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
