He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
