i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Your tits are I can't wait for
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Randomize
