i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
drinking out of a sandbucket again
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
