Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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