Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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