There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
