Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
