Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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