he thought i was a dude.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Rumble strips road head = magical
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
