Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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