We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
