Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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