ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
