He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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