Your mouth is God's brothel.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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