I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
