Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
