I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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