It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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