you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
