How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
