I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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