actually, I'm a sock model
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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