using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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