why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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