he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
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So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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