you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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