I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
