Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize