we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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