so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Randomize
