chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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