I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
