bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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