Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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