she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
