i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
